A Modest Farmer

After he left Federal Parliament, Bert continued his writings—first in The Australian Financial Review, then The Bulletin and later in The Australian (with a few regional publications along the way). His final “Modest” column was published in May 1987. Our sincere thanks to Benjamin Marks (www.economics.org.au) for converting Bert’s hard copy publications into electronic form.

1.My pearls of wisdom were dull beyond belief, AFR, 23 December 1977.

2.Should facts stand in the way of a good story?, AFR, 20 January 1978.

3.Trade wars can easily end up on a battlefield, AFR, 3 February 1978.

4.Farmers cowed by tariffs fallout, AFR, 10 February 1978.

5.Show us how we can twist our MP’s ear …, AFR, 17 February 1978.

6.How to impress your MP – ambush him, AFR, 24 February 1978.

7.Don’t feel sorry for him – hang on to his ear, AFR, 10 March 1978.

8.How a well meaning Government can be so stupid, AFR, 17 March 1978.

9.When I buy cattle, why does Fred start to sell?, AFR, 31 March 1978.

10.How a chance to boost our exports goes up in smoke, AFR, 21 April 1978.

11.The sacred education cow has had her day, AFR, 28 April 1978.

12.Being loved by all is not always a good thing, AFR, 23 June 1978.

13.You must get rid of that wretched law, dear, AFR, 7 July 1978.

14.The language of power, AFR, 8 September 1978.

15.Why leading businessmen carry black briefcases, AFR, 29 September 1978.

16.A rather crude man got stuck into me at the discussion, AFR, 6 October 1978.

17.MPs don’t always behave like yahoos and larrikins, AFR, 3 November 1978.

18.They’ll be stroking their platitudes till they purr, AFR, 10 November 1978.

19.He’d soon have his feet in a bucket of champagne, AFR, 17 November 1978.

20. Governments sometimes act like Ginger at the war”, AFR, 24 November 1978.

21. “Farmer gave the parson a very sour reply”, AFR, 22 December 1978.

22. “I like my kind acts to get a mention in the press”, AFR, 19 January 1979.

23. “Know your proper place if you want the quiet life”, AFR, 2 February 1979.

24. “The tide has caught up with Eccles — or has it?”, AFR, 23 March 1978.

25. “Tariff cuts are all right if they don’t really happen”, AFR, 30 March 1979.

26. “Should we take Japan as a model for control?”, AFR, 6 April 1979.

27. “Mavis kicks the bucket under govt milch cow”, AFR, 4 May 1979.

28. “That welfare State tiger may eat us in the end”, AFR, 13 July 1979.

29. “Soft hearted foolish people blinded by their tears”, AFR, 3 August 1979.

30. “Anniversary thought — and offer”, AFR, 17 August 1979.

31. “Successful government intervention can occur”, AFR, 24 August 1979.

32. “Country Party policies may not help farmers but do save seats”, AFR, 7 September 1979.

33. “The C’wealth milks the cow but the State gets the cream”, AFR, 14 September 1979.

34. “Economic understanding will triumph in the end”, AFR, 5 October 1979.

35. “Planting compassion on the Apple Isle”, AFR, 30 November 1979.

36. “Colonialism still lingers in shipping circles”, AFR, 8 February 1980.

37. “The importance of easing the fear and pain of change”, AFR, 29 February 1980.

38. “What to do when market forces control exchange rate”, AFR, 7 March 1980.

39. “Book shows Australia the way to the year 2000”, AFR, 3 April 1980.

40. “Is Anthony ignorant or indifferent on tariffs?”, AFR, 9 May 1980.

41. “How many does it take to crowd a feather bed?”, AFR, 6 June 1980.

42. “Once on a feather bed, what to do next?”, AFR, 13 June 1980.

43. “Feather beds are comfortable if the mob is kept off them”, AFR, 20 June 1980.

44. “Conference lines take to plush waterbeds”, AFR, 27 June 1980.

45. “Shipping feather bed attracts large crew”, AFR, 4 July 1980.

46. “Feather beds take to the air”, Stock and Land, 19 June 1980.

47. “Consumers find feather beds a bit hard!”, Stock and Land, 26 June 1980.

48. “Yes … the Wheat Board has a feather bed, too!”, Stock and Land, 3 July 1980.

49. “Why should Mavis want me to learn to draw?”, AFR, 17 October 1980.

50. “The Modest Farmer joins us”/“How The Modest Member came to be”, The Bulletin, 4 November 1980 and 11 November 1980.

51. “Cold comfort on a return trip”, The Bulletin, 23/30 December 1980.

52. “Animal lib the new scourge of the bush”, The Bulletin, 13 January 1981.

53. “Protections that nobody needs”, The Bulletin, 20 January 1981.

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